Yoga Retreats-CULT Exposed!

Swami Satchidananda (1914-2002) has a yoga superstar moment when giving the invocation at Woodstock. In 1991, protesters waving placards (“Stop the Abuse,” “End the Cover Up”) protesters march outside a Virginia hotel where the swami is addressing a symposium.

Brahmacharya means taking a vow of celibacy. Apparently, that was only for followers of his yoga cult.

My story takes place during the first yoga guru sex scandal in 1972. At the time, the IYI Integral Yoga Institute is the largest influence on my generation for indoctrinating youth into the yoga cult.

The Village Voice expose’ of 1973

The Village Voice expose’ brings public attention to the yoga cult leader by a reliable source, Bhaskar. He was the director of an East Coast IYI, who learns on his wedding night that the beloved guru deflowered his bride. She served as a personal secretary prior to her wedding to Bhaskar. So, the angry groom calls each of the fifteen IYI directors nationwide, informing them of the breach of trust. So, here we are, working and living a full-time ashram life according to his outline disciplines. In those days, one could not be a live-in instructor without taking a vow of brahmacharya.

Downsizing enhances the guru’s profits

Followers of the IYI, may well know an East Coast Yogaville teacher trainer, Vidya Vonne, former name Chandrika. In 1971-73, we are the only two women remaining in the Los Angeles ashram after the celibacy mandate. So, we downsize from the palatial digs in the Hollywood hills leased from Woody Allen. Consequently, from 27 ashram resident instructors, the mandate reduces the teaching staff to just five of us. Even our director, Moorti, leaves because his lover, Hamsa, was soon to show her pregnancy, and they were betrothed. They relocate to Georgia to raise a family where they are a couple in their eighties now.

Three men stay on, including a new director from Texas to replace Moorti who is marrying.

So Tirumal, aka Steve Clark from Texas, became our LA director. Govinda, aka Kevin Walsh from New York, and Sudharman, Tom Kennedy RIP, made up our household staff at the LA ashram. After the dispersion, Ganesh, aka Paul, wanders back in to rejoin the LA ashram. Then, Sudharman left and married Malati in the SF IYI. Sadly, the marriage was short-lived when he came out.

Powers of a Yoga Cult

Then the night after Tirumal informs us of Bhaskar’s phone call, the house is quiet as everyone retreats for solitude. Suddenly, Chandrika screams for me to come upstairs quickly to the meditation room. She was visibly shaken and wanted me to witness the tears streaming from the photo of Satchidananda’s photo on the altar, but I refused. The whole thing creeped me out. Satchidanada was known for displaying supernatural powers such as the blasting white light he bombed me with during my initiation ceremony. However, we Christians know these displays are not always heavenly, but evil shows to confuse us.

Barely eighteen when I came in as a full-time instructor, I felt betrayal and indecision about my stance. Would I go or would I stay?

My teaching assignment as the West Coast teaching delegate for the Ten-Day Ecumenical Retreat in New York woud come in June 1973. After that, I was looking forward to a verified appointment for darshan with the swami at his residence in Pomfret, Connecticut. Then, I could discuss my future at the IYI with him.

Meanwhile, people disappear, and others appear.

Our director, Tirumal, disappears after withdrawing $11K from the operating account

Within the next week, Govinda and Chandrika told me that our director and trusted leader, Tirumal, disappeared after withdrawing $11K from the operating account. We were broke and needed assistance from our sister Ashram in San Francisco. Vijay would have to send new staff and fund us to stay viable. A decision is made to house only women in Los Angeles. A new director, Divya, who had been in a common law marriage in San Francisco, shaved her head and took Brahmacharya to be the director.

Yoga Cult Deviants

She made it clear immediately that she was in charge and humiliated me several times. As the kitchen housemother, I had the task of food shopping and preparing. Under her criticism, I stepped aside so she could take it over. Suddenly, the kitchen was off-limits. Only she was allowed in it. Unfortunately, our teaching schedules and eating opportunities differed from her hours. Divya intended to subordinate us to her in many ways, starting with the kitchen.

West Coast teacher trainer

Fortunately, I held my own at the Asana rock star and West Coast teacher trainer. My presentation skills honed well by doing so many campus presentations, classes, and retreats, including our Yogaville West. It was in Northern California, an old hot springs resort built in the thirties. After a couple of years, maintenance costs prohibited continuing.

Youthful status

On June 3^rd, 1973, I was twenty years old, and we drove across the country in a drive-away car to upstate New York. There were four of us on the trip: Dinabandhu, aka Dale, and another couple of followers from the Los Angeles IYI. I was the only ashram teacher sent to represent, and the others would participate as attendees in the 10-day silent retreat.

Vegas Yoga

I recall stopping in Las Vegas along the way, and we walked down Fremont Street. In those days, it was a thoroughfare for vehicles. Being the only minor, I was reluctant to go inside the casinos. Little did I know that I would return by plane in September, making it my home for the next fifty-plus years.

Alas, the lure of a yoga cult is the sense of belonging.

Late afternoon, we arrive and check in at the retreat. It was a lovely Catholic lakeside retreat property with an outdoor auditorium, cabins, and beautiful walkways through the woods. The experience is surreal because I interact with so many yoga teachers whom I had hosted as the house-mother in L.A.  Just before the evening meditation and Swami Satchidananda’s opening lecture, I am sent word of a prestigious invitation for darshan afterward. Darshan is the Sanskrit word for keeping company with an elightened guru.

What a sense of belonging I am feeling!

Here I am, all the way from Los Angeles, with my teacher trainer status. Now, I have the welcoming inclusion along with peer admiration.  Alas, the lure of cults is the sense of belonging. Reflecting on two years since auditioning at the September 1971 yoga retreat becoming the new yoga teacher recruit for Los Angeles.

Darshan or dastardly

The invitation was to meet with a swami I hosted many times in L.A. with his wife, cook, and teenage son. His son gave me tabla Indian finger drum lessons. His wife and cook taught me their cultural cuisine in my kitchen. I knew them all quite well and had a comfortable familiarity. Needless to say, I looked forward to seeing them.

Daze and confuse  – strategy of a deviant

Excited about the darshan and who may be among the other lucky ones to be invited, I walked in the dark to find the cabin for darshan.  There were no lights, and the cabin was dark, so I my excitement quickly turns to confusion. I walk back and forth without finding anyone else around. Where are the others? Then, the swami pops out in the dark, urging me to enter the cabin. There didn’t appear to be anyone else there.

Here comes the spin – the woo-woo dialogue

I asked where his family and his wife were, “Where is Rama Mata?” I asked.

“To me, you are she!” He says as he forcibly grabs the back of my head, thrusting his tongue into my mouth. I immediately broke free and fled.

Struck with complete disallusioning, I go into solitude for the next ten days, only emerging to teach my Asana classes.

It was clear to me now: I was in a yoga cult following the IYI movement.

The darshan with Swami Satchidananda would follow after the retreat, and then I could get some direction. My appointment was set for months and I looked forward to getting some answers for my two years of unpaid service. Essentially, I lined the pocket of the guru while I slept on a hard-wood floor owning three sets of yoga teaching pajamas. Renounce all materialism!

Two years of austerity and sacrifice reckoning

The final day of the retreat and farewells began. Now, people speak for the first time in ten days since the mouna vow of silence.  My friends John Fahey and Marilyn from L. A. want me to ride back with them, as they were both my yoga students, having met through me and were now a couple. but I had my mission to get to Pomfret, Connecticut, the palacial residence of Satchidananda.  Still, I had to make the all-important call to Pomfret to confirm my appointment with Satchidananda and get directions to the estate.  Awaiting the use of the only telephone line, finally, my turn came within a half hour of the phone line being shut off. The retreat utilities were shutting down, and the place where six hundred yoga practitioners congregated for the last ten days suddenly became deserted.

I was alone in the cabin to make my call.

The swami’s secretary answered and told me that all appointments were now canceled because he spoke at the retreat ten days ago. He must restore his energy in anticipation of prestigious guests arriving from Europe in a few weeks.

Plea for validation and purpose

“But I made this appointment months ago, and I must speak to him before returning to the west coast. You don’t understand, I have served as a full-time ashram instructor for the last two years. I have important spiritual matters and decisions to discuss with him. Surely, he can at least speak to me on the phone, can’t he? Won’t you please let him know?”

Then, she insists that he is about to have lunch and cannot be disturbed. Exasperated, I insist that the matter is urgent and the phone will be shut off within the next half hour. It is imperative that I speak to him about important matters for personal decisions.

Final disallusionment of the yoga cult

Reluctantly, she promised to take the number and call me back one way or the other. Twenty minutes passed, and I began to doubt that the phone would still work or that she could get him on the line.

The phone rang, and I answered, ” Hello?”

Here comes the life-changing dialogue

Then the Swami himself responded boomingly, “Very well, what is it that is so important to take me from my noon-day meal?!”

“Why, NOTHING is so important to take you from your meal, Swamiji! Thank you for calling.”

“Well, surely, My Child, you must have deep spiritual questions to ask of me.”

“Oh no, just the sound of your voice has given me my answers. I am enlightened. Thank you.”

Life after a yoga cult

January 28, 2014

For the past 42 years, I have a desire to express my gratitude to a woman who has significantly shaped my lifelong views on nutrition and health. Finally, yesterday, I got to tell Hamsa Newmark how important her influence has proved to be!

Today, at age 60, I feel compelled to work on my bucket list, and thanking Hamsa was on that list. After some research, I spoke to both Moorti and Hamsa yesterday for the first time since we said goodbye in the doorway of the Hollywood ashram in 1972.

Reflection on the yoga cult days

Indeed, she had no way of realizing her impact on me when she took me under her wing at the Integral Yoga Institute of Los Angeles in 1971. As a resident instructor, I was given a domestic role in the ashram as an assistant to the house mother. Before joining the yoga commune, Hamsa ran her own natural foods restaurant in Sonoma County, California. High in the Hollywood Hills on Benda Place, Woody Allen leased to the ashram his sprawling hillside residential property complete with guest houses, an Olympic-sized swimming pool, and basketball and tennis courts. It was a yoga haven.

Hippie Free Love Commune

Over two dozen instructors were in a split-level estate residence when I arrived. Hamsa needed an excellent assistant to help shop and prepare the wholesome vegetarian meals that were part of the teaching discipline. I came with a clean slate, having never been taught cooking in any respect. I had the Zen mindset of a true beginner who was ready to learn. She taught me the how and why of natural food preparation and cooking from macrobiotic grains, fruits, vegetables, and sprouts.

Sense of belonging to a family – ingredients of a cult

Moorti Newmark was the institute’s director, while Hamsa served as a house mother. The two of them were the patriarch and matriarch of the ashram. They were the role models to so many of us teachers and students.

Then, one day, Swami Satchidananda made a new ruling that only Brahmacharis, those who had taken a vow of chastity, would reside at the ashram. All householders (couples) would begin serving in a non-resident capacity. Moorti and Hamsa had fallen in love and chose to be together and leave the ashram life behind. At age eighteen, I was promoted to house mother in the kitchen for the remainder of my two-year teaching tenure.

Hamsa had prepared me very well for the role, and I enjoyed it so much that I have continued to share the gospel of natural food throughout my life and fitness career.

In yoga, a samskara is a well-ingrained experience that stays with a person, shaping future thoughts.

Today, I host live-in fitness and weight loss clients at my residence. My kitchen is the hub of the learning experience where people of all ages develop new eating habits through wholesome food choices. Recently, a TV crew did a segment here, and one of the scenes they shot included me showing a client how to chop a carrot on the diagonal. I explained the reason as yin and yang balance—another Hamsa samskara! In yoga, a samskara is a well-ingrained experience that stays with a person, shaping future thoughts. I thank Hamsa for sharing her passion for natural foods, which opened my eyes at the age of 18.

Let me know if you want to hear more about my Yoga Cult experiences.

Questions? Choose your best day and time to start with a 15-minute introductory talk and add it to my calendar right here.

About the author …

If you are ready to immerse yourself in a wellness lifestyle, consider my private yoga wellness retreat residence for a minimum stay of one week. Rest assured, you will not find a yoga cult here! Try a weekend yoga wellness getaway!
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